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Latinx Salud Poems:  An Inaugural Collection

Pains of Denials

I remember my mother yelling in Spanish: ​​“Cuando van a mandar la autorización?“
I remember my mother sitting in our kitchen waiting on the phone for hours.
I remember wondering why something was wrong with me.
I remember feeling guilt putting my family through pain.
Why was my mom yelling?
Why did she need to defend me?
Why was this difficult?
Mami just wanted to know when we would get medical insurance to approve my neurologist appointment.


I remember showing up to a neurologist office and being denied coverage.
I remember being confused about “We don’t cover your insurance anymore.”
I remember the neurologist looking at my parents and saying “150 dollars out-of-pocket cost,”
and my parents being unable to pay.
I remember being prescribed the cheapest seizure medication covered by my medical
insurance, which had devastating side effects.
I remember being told by a doctor that anxiety was only in my head, and that ocular migraines
were a figment of my imagination.
I remember being denied access to a therapist for more than six months when I was having
panic attacks every day at the age of sixteen.


After a certain point in my life, I stopped wondering if justice existed in health insurance,
because I know that it did not for my family.
I look at my family, and we are still struggling.
I have been fighting with health insurance companies my whole life.
I am tired of advocating for justice when this country has let me down, when the system meant
to work for me and my family is still broken.


My mother has been denied seeing a surgeon three times.
The health insurance companies don’t want to pay for someone out of network.
They send letters saying we have rights, and I wonder: what are the rights we have?
Waiting 6 months for an approval to see a surgeon?


Mis papás me dicen que así es, pero yo lloro diciéndoles que no.
Diciéndoles que no los dejen sentir que no importan, porque sí importamos.
I am important.
My family is important.
Our community is important.







Jun 2019






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